Getting emotional~
Monday, 26 May 2008
It is the time-of-the month, and I am on the emotional roller-coaster ride. If you are a girl, you will get what I mean. If you are a guy, you will ALSO get what I mean- the period to be on the tip of your toes for 24h. I vividly remembered my buddy said he would like to experience this mood swing if he gets the chance to turn into a girl. Well... if that will make a guy understands a girl better especially during this period, I seriously hope that a guy would experience this at least once every 3 months and vice versa.
The above is just some random thoughts when I typed out my first sentence.. haha. As I was saying about emo-swing, it is like a few hours of happiness and suddenly a few hours of moodiness. Currently, I feeling nostalgic.
I was flipping through the newspapers for jobs and came across an ad on drawing. Before I knew it, flood of memories drowned my mind. All those memories are years ago but they are so crystal clear that as if they took place just yesterday. When I was 5 or 6 years old, my parents signed me up for art class, abacus class..etc. I hated art class then. I knew the reasons for my parents to load with so many classes. Partly to enrich myself but more importantly, so that I could be so preoccupied that I would not miss my relatives in Malaysia. I also hated my parents then. Hated them for not being constantly present in the first 6 years of my life, hated them for their out-of-the blue appearance and promptly send me to Singapore, hated them for pulling me out of my dear school and schoolmates, hated them for lying that I will get to see my beloved relatives often, hated for them for sending me to classes so that these will become a reason for being unable to go back Malaysia. So much hatred for a 6 year old huh... Everything was just so sudden and I was caught so unprepared. I remembered crying on each saturday because they had promised that they will bring me to Malaysia every saturday if there is nothing on. My many enrichment classes fell on saturday, so we went back once every a few weeks. I would cry everytime I had to leave for Singapore. I also remembered my one and only female cousin (from my paternal family)said that if you made 100 stars and wish upon them, you wish will come true. I was overjoyed! Finally, a chance for me to go back to Malaysia. I desparately made 100 stars and wish... until today, it yet to come true.
They said time will wash emotions away. Indeed, my emotional attachment to my relatives, school and friends began to weaken. Today, it is just missing them. Maybe because I have grown up, maybe the emotional ties are no longer as strong, maybe I am not sure. In any case, I no longer hate my parents. They wanted the best for me. I dont know how will my life turns out to be if I am still in Malaysia. I like art class in actual fact.. haha.. because there are so many colours to play with. I love my parents despite what they did... afterall, they were first-time parents and do not know how to deal with a child. I wanted to thank them because, through this I really treasure the people around me.
Now, I am feeling happier typing out all these... heheh. Told you, it is the time of the month
-- Shirlyn --
13:51